What is it about being an introvert and doing your job well, attract bullies in the workplace?

Let’s talk about it…

“Hey April, what’s going on girl?” April looks up at her co-worker, she thinks to herself before replying. Why these people cannot leave me alone when they see me reading my book as I eat my lunch. Can a girl have a moment to herself before going back to work?” Instead of saying what she was thinking; April replied to her co-worker by saying, “Hey Joy, you know me; trying to relax my mind with reading before going back to work. You look like you have something on your mind Joy; so, what is on your mind?” “Well, I and some of the other girls would like to invite you to go to Happy Hour after work.” With a surprised look on her face, April asked Joy, “they still have Happy Hour? I thought that ended in the nineties.” There are still a few places that have Happy Hours states Joy. “Well, thanks for the invite, I will pass. I hope you and the girls enjoy yourselves.” April’s co-worker Joy turns up her nose and rolls her eyes before walking off. Gee whiz, thought April, I do not get it. Why do these people get so mad because I do not hang out with them? I am sociable at work when I am not reading my book at lunch. So, what is the big deal about one less among a crowd at happy hour? Hell, they act like they cannot have fun unless I attend. Go figure.

April was only able to read two full pages before it was time to return to work. April feels she socialize well with her co-workers at work. Her cubicle is in the middle of Sandy and Jean. She would talk to them over the cubicle every day. Many times, they would talk as they work. They do not care if other employees sitting near heard their conversations. Anything said that was personal or private was done by whispering as they gather in one person’s cubicle. Sandy is the co-worker who knows everyone’s business in the company. She always greets everyone with a hug and a “God bless your heart.” April use to wonder, why Sandy cannot simply say “good morning” or “hello”. After a year of working with her co-worker, April realized, Sandy’s religious routine was her way of getting people to trust and confide in her. Co-workers would come confess their sins and burdens to Sandy like they were in a confession booth at their church. April and Sandy, both defined themselves as Christians. However, April was more spiritual than religious. She did not announce to all that had an ear to hear that she went to church or is a believer. She operated within the realm of spiritual insight, only as the spirit guided her to do so. Sandy would often come into April’s cubicle and grab a couple of her fingers while stating “Sis, I need you to touch and agree with me in prayer;” April knew this was Sandy’s opening to gossip about one of the confessions given to her from another co-worker. April would tell Sandy, God hears you; you do not need me to touch and agree with you. Be an intercessor by praying in private. Also, Sandy would express her angry towards April for talking to co-workers that she classified as sinners. She would say to April, why are you talking to her? I told you she is an alcoholic who sleeps with marry men. Or, she would say, do not engage in a conversation with him because he is a womanizer. April refused to allow Sandy to control her work relationship with people based on their confessions to her. On several occasions, April would overhear Sandy lying to co-workers about her. After co-workers listen to the lies Sandy told them about her, these co-workers would treat April like she was contaminated goods. Many would turn up their nose to her or roll their eyes at her for no reason. One day April was reading her book while eating her lunch, when she hears a co-worker say to another co-worker while looking in her direction, she thinks she is better than everyone here and she loves to judge people so do not tell her your business. The person receiving this information ask, who are you talking about. The gossiper reply was the only person in here reading a book. April sat quietly hearing co-workers who did not know her or ever had a conversation with her believe a lie told to them, then act on that lie by treating her like she was the worst person in the world.

 April refused to allow the lies defined who she is as a person. She vowed to herself, to continue to be her true authentic self regardless of how people treat her. April was getting use to co-workers treating her like shit, then tuck their tails between their legs because they need her expertise. April loved what she did for a living, and she made sure it showed in her work. Regardless of the negative or nick picking treatment she received, she always gave her best in performing her job and working with people. April would often quote within her thoughts the scripture found in Matthew 5:16, “let your light shine before man so that they may see your good works and glorify your father which is in heaven”.

Sandy told April that she was not being a good Christian because she was not reprimanding people for their wrong doing. April could not believe what she was hearing. She looks Sandy directly in her eyes then says to her; “you do not know what a good Christian is because you are not a Christian. You are a religious hypocrite. How dare you expect me to treat people according to your judgment of their sins or wrong doing based on what they confided in you. What are you doing in reprimanding judgment of what was told to you; besides trying to bully me into acting according to your will for their lives? I am not their God and neither is you. I do not have a heaven or a hell to put these people in; therefore, I will not judge them. I am a sinner saved by grace and in case you do not know, so are you. So why are you acting like you are the holy police captain and I am one of your officers to bring law and order. You have these people treating me like shit based on lies you told them about me. I see now that something is seriously wrong with you. Therefore, I will take my own advice and pray for you in private.” Sandy, walks away from April without saying a word. She never said anything else to April about not acting like a Christian. Seven months later, Sandy quits her job.

Although Sandy no longer worked at the company the bad seed she planned about April is still in the darkness of the co-workers’ mind. Co-workers would take supplies from April’s desk as well as her personal items like lotion, hand sanitizer, her box of Kleenex and cough drops. A director of another department once picked up a nasty rubber band off the floor, then placed it on April’s desk as he presses his thumb into her shoulder while saying “don’t say I never gave you anything.” She had co-workers go to her management with lies. One of her managers asked Aprils why do you want to move to another cubicle? What is wrong with where you are sitting? April looks at the manager strangely before replying. I never said I wanted to move to another cubicle. There is nothing wrong with where I am sitting. The manager then states; “you never told anyone you were unhappy with where you are sitting and wants to move.” April replies; “I never ever had that conversation with anyone. I never said that to anyone.” Another manager approaches April as she was working and stands over her back as a form of intimidation. April turns her head, looks up at the manager, smiled, and says “hello”. The manager proceeded to say to April, “you are not perfect, you make mistakes.” “I know I am not perfect. I never said that I was, replied April.” The manager walks out of April’s cubicle without saying another word. April could not help but wonder, what was that all about.

Although April worked in a department that have many employees, she is the only one who knows how to do what she does. April watch many of her co-workers in her department take long vacations, as well as long personal leaves of absence as other co-workers in her department cover for them. April, normally takes a day or two off because there is no one to cover for her. Once a year, when she would take five consecutive days off, she would have to train someone for two weeks to cover only what could not be placed on hold until she returns. Which means when she returned, the work placed on hold was added to her day-to-day work. April would often tell her manager that her job was a two-person job and that someone should be trained to do what she does. For years her manager agreed to get her help. April’s manager tried to appease her by promoting someone in the department giving them the same title as April but not the work; this person was promoted, yet they continue to work with the other employees in the department and cover them in their absence.

As the company grew so did April’s workload. April notices her work performance had begun to suffer due to the growth in work without any help. She continued to complain about needing help. Her manger would promise help is coming. Her manager begins to verbally reprimand her for work she could not complete and for minor mistakes she was making because she did not have the time to double check her work, because something else was being requested of her. On top of the heavy workload without any help, April’s manager was giving her more responsibilities. April begins to feel like her manager ignoring her cry for help is a form of abuse. To April, this form of abuse is in the same category as workplace bulling. April realized her time at this company was up. It was time to move on. April was offer one more promise after submitting her two-week resignation. Her manager promises to promote her to supervisor in six months should the position become available. April thought to herself as she declined the offer, “well at least this time my manager is letting me know the supervisor position is not a real possibility.”